Jennifer

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Genre: Fantasy Characters: an architect and a crime scene investigator Setting: the Tardis

Streaks of light poured in from the roof. Pour. As in standing under a waterfall pour. Not in a nice, soaking in a golden glow kind of pouring light, but a stuck outside in a thunderstorm rain kind of pouring. In fact...it was very much like that. Let me backtrack a bit. I’m an architect, I was called in by a crime scene investigator named Luke this morning for a disappearance in a house I designed (which is a brilliant by the way). They said the clues stopped in the middle of the floor and called me in to investigate whether there were any secret spaces in my design. Well there was. But not there, not where the person disappeared. When we got there, a man named the Doctor appeared in the strangest way and most suspicious way possible. A blue police box appeared out of nowhere in almost the exact same spot the clues ended. Luke barged into the box and insisted on interrogating him. Then, the most amazing thing happened. The door actually opens. I mean, so many times those stupid doors won’t open in those phone booth, they’re just stuck. What’s the point of them if you can’t get in. Oh and the The box, it looked small on the outside but was bigger on the inside. Nothing I couldn’t design though.

And now? Well...I don’t exactly know what’s happening now. We’re in this box and streaks of light is pouring in. Like rain. Exactly like rain. Like I can see droplets of light splashing onto the floor. ____

I remembered thinking about how beautiful everything looked when something hit the box. No, not a small little tap that sends echoes up to your ears but a hit that sends you flying off your feet and crashing into the walls on the other side of the box.

“What was that?!” I yelled at no one in particular. “Oh nothing to worry about. I’ve got this under control” said Doctor, standing at this control panel-like thing, pushing buttons with every finger on his hand. “Nootthhing to worry about. Only a small...you know...time travel but nothing I can’t fix”

“T-time..time travel...TIME TRAVEL?!” I yelled back at him. “Calm down miss. Really, there’s no need to make such a huge fuss about this” replied the Doctor who was now staring at this transparent screen with squiggles and dots and spirals.

“But how..but i...but when?? Ah i give up.” I slumped down onto the floor of the Tardis, listening to the tap tap beep beep whirrrr of the control panel and watching the maniac work with his toy.

“So uh...where- I mean when are we?” I asked after watching his fingers fly away at the control panel.

“Oh erm well. I believe it would be best if you didn’t know. Considering your...small tendencies for panic attacks.”

“How considerate yet insulting. I...uh….could you still tell me when we are?”

“Hm madam I strongly advise against your request.”

“I promise I won’t freak. Promise.” I received a skeptical look from Doctor at that comment. “Pinky promise?” *** It was at this moment at the floor began violently shaking. I lept onto the Doctor’s arms and wrapped my legs around him. “WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ONNNN” “I thought you just promised you won’t freak!” By now the shaking had stopped, and the Doctor let me down to the floor again. He opened the door of the box and we were met by a horrendous smell. “What in the world…” I said as I peered outside. It was the biggest pile of poop I have ever seen in my life. It was at least 10 stories high and 10 square meters. It was neatly shaped like a rectangular prism. Countless flies and mosquitos whirled around the tower of poop, and soon poured into the box. “We have to get out of here before we get malaria!” exclaimed the Doctor as he dragged my hand out of the door “Why did you just rip my hand off!???” I yelled frantically as I stared at the end of my arm, which now has become a bloody mess. “Wait...what!???” The Doctor was as confused as me. He did not possess any super powers whatsoever and had no idea why my hand came off so easily. “Wait a minute…” I looked at myself and it was at this moment that I realized that I was actualy a reptile

I was clearly some sort of lizard (as anyone with any knowledge of biology would realise). The question was, how?

All I knew was that there was a big pile of sh*t standing right in front of me, a pretty girly-looking Doctor, and some sort of tow-headed, brute of an investigator.

Something didn’t add up, but I was gonna get to the bottom of it.

That’s right, the name’s Tracer Bullet, private eye. No, I’m not really an architect, and no, I’m not really a girl. But what I am is a man with a revolver in his jacket pocket, and when I have a discussion with someone, I never list more than six reasons to support my arguments.

About that time, a dame walked into my line of sight, the kind with legs that go all the way up. But she wasn’t messing around. No, she was all business.

“I’ve got a case for you, Bullet. There’s been some sort of robbery downtown, and the cops are out of their league. We need you.”

“I’ll tell you what sweet stuff, meet me at Mortin’s tomorrow night, and you have yourself a deal.”